302. TMTF Reviews: TMTF Reviews

A long time ago, I began reviewing books. It’s a vice, I know. I can’t help it. Some time later, I started reviewing video games. Look, I know I have a problem. Don’t judge me for judging things.

I’ve been thinking lately of how to improve TMTF Reviews. It occurred to me that they could be more streamlined and better organized. It’s time for a change.

That said, today’s review is a little different. It’s shorter than usual, bizarrely meta, and unexpectedly significant. We’re going to figure out how to make these reviews more helpful and easier to read.

This time, TMTF reviews TMTF Reviews.

Wait, what?

TMTF Reviews

The Good…

Up to this point, TMTF Reviews have been bleak, black-and-white blocks of words broken only by the occasional picture. We’re adding titles! Besides breaking up the monotony of prose, titles will make navigating reviews quicker and easier.

The style and content of reviews shan’t change. I’ve always tried to give thoughtful evaluations of things. My reviews aren’t great, but at least they give unique, honest perspectives and impressions of books and video games.

We’re making one more major change to TMTF Reviews, but I’ll get to that one in just a bit.

The Bad…

TMTF Reviews have plenty of problems. I’m neither a gaming pro nor a literary expert, and my reviews are far from professional. In fact, TMTF Reviews mostly consist of me rambling about stuff I’ve read and played, and throwing my ramblings into the lives of innocent, unsuspecting readers.

And the Fabulous

All in all, TMTF Reviews are as much a part of this blog as personal reflections and Legend of Zelda references. I can hardly imagine TMTF without its reviews, despite their faults, and I’m excited to make them a little easier to read.

This brings me to that final change I mentioned before. Inspired by the superb reviewing format used by Kotaku, I’ve decided to summarize each TMTF Review in a simple, colorful, fabulous graphic!

TMTF Reviews - TMTF Reviews

All right, the graphic isn’t that fabulous. Still, I hope it helps. Now you don’t even have to read TMTF Reviews anymore! You can just skip to the summary for the most important information!

Wait… it’s probably a bad thing if readers quit reading my reviews. Ah, well. Alea iacta est. (That’s Latin for “Such is the price for fabulous things,” or something like that. I could be wrong.)

Having improved the format for reviews, I’m eager to review the heck out of things… but I suppose I’ll have to go read a book or a play a game first.

I should probably get a start on that.

301. Blogging Anarchy

In some distant, dusty corner of my mind, there is a list titled What Adam Wants to Be When He Grows Up.

I’ve spent the past half a decade or so crossing things off this list. Voice actor was the first to go, followed by Author and Professional blogger years later. My list seems to get a little smaller every year; at this point, it consists of English teacherCopy editor, C.S. Lewis, and G.K. Chesterton. Those last two probably aren’t realistic options, since they’ve already been taken by other people.

The latest profession to be removed from What Adam Wants to Be When He Grows Up was Video game journalist. Yes, video game journalism is a thing. Someone has to review all those games, interview game developers, and cover events like E3, after all!

In the past few years, I’ve delved into the fascinating world of video game journalism and found it awesome… and also kind of awful.

I love writing. I love video games. Video game journalism unites two of my greatest interests in one exciting career. For a few months, I seriously considered looking into the profession. Like voice acting all those years ago, video game journalism seemed almost too good to be true.

Well, like voice acting, video game journalism turns out to be a heck of a lot harder than it looks. It takes more than a knack for writing and a passion for gaming. Video game journalism has extremely tight deadlines and not much job security. The job requires extensive research, technical know-how, and a high tolerance for brutal, abusive reactions.

The video game industry seems to have more than its fair share of spiteful people: gamers prowling around like roaring lions seeking whom they may devour. Every controversy in the video game industry, and media coverage thereof, gets messy. Insults, accusations, and—I hate to say this—death threats are not uncommon.

Some gamers don’t even need controversies to be cruel. All it takes to kindle their fury is a dissenting opinion. Vicious arguments are started by mild statements like “I think Majora’s Mask is a better game than Ocarina of Time,” and woe to the journalist brave enough to discuss touchy subjects like religion or feminism in video games!

In this journalistic minefield, video game journalists are wary. They follow complicated regulations about transparency and conflicts of interest. (These rules are good, fair, and necessary, but definitely a headache.) Some journalists have been publicly shamed, and had to apologize, for honest opinions.

All of this makes me especially thankful for the anarchy of blogging.

Well, anarchy may not be the best word; freedom is probably a more positive one. As the world of video game journalism is shaken by GamerGate, a recent mess of controversies involving feminist criticisms and alleged conflicts of interest, I find myself more thankful than ever for the freedom to write whatever the heck I want to write.

One of many things that makes blogging fun is that is has so few regulations. Nearly every rule for this blog is self-imposed. TMTF has deadlines and guidelines and whatnot, but they’re all the ones I chose for it. Blogging isn’t a minefield whose navigation requires strict rules. All it takes to write a blog is passion, a little experience, and maybe just a hint of insanity.

I admire video game journalists. I hope the problems of GamerGate are quickly and peacefully resolved.

Most of all, I am so, so thankful for the anarchy of blogging.

300. Creative Counseling with DRWolf

In past months, I’ve felt burned out. Writing has been harder. I realized it was time for this blog to get some help, so I met with DRWolf—a creative thinker known for his work in the brony community—to discuss the problem. He was friendly, polite, and helpful. What I didn’t expect was for the good doctor actually to be… you know… a wolf.

I want to thank DRWolf for his time, consideration, and advice. I was sincerely interested in finding some answers, and he gave some really good ones. Keep up the fine work, Doctor. It was an honor to work with you.

I also want to thank Crowne Prince, animator extraordinaire, for the superb video. It’s absolutely fantastic, Ms. Prince. I appreciate your time and expertise!

As usual whenever I stumble over a blogging milestone, I have a few more words to say.

I owe a great debt of gratitude to my parents for their support and encouragement, and especially to my father for his tips and artwork. Without him, TMTF would probably not have lasted long. Thanks, old man. You’re the stoutest of Stout Fellas.

Next, a word to my typewriter monkeys: If you ever do that again, I will donate you to the zoo. I mean it this time.

Speaking of my monkeys, I guess they deserve some credit. Despite their laziness, pyromania, and extensive criminal record, I don’t know how I would keep TMTF up and running without my dirty dozen: Sophia, Socrates, Plato, Hera, Penelope, Aristotle, Apollo, Euripides, Icarus, Athena, Phoebe, and Aquila. Thanks, guys.

(I’m serious about the zoo, though. Behave yourselves for once!)

My readers have been far kinder to this blog than my monkeys ever have. To every person who has supported TMTF by commenting on it, sharing it, liking posts here or on Facebook, writing guest posts, celebrating Be Nice to Someone on the Internet Day, or simply reading the blog occasionally—thank you. Thank you so much. The greatest joy of a writer is to be read, and I appreciate every single one of you.

Finally—insofar as a blog about video games, Doctor Who, and exploding tomatoes can honor anybody—soli Deo gloria. Whatever my struggles, I hope these three words will always be my guiding principle for creativity.

On a less spiritual note… if I had a penny for every post I’ve written for this blog, I’d have enough money to go out and buy a cup of coffee. That’s pretty neat. All in all, thanks to all of you, it seems I haven’t quite run out of reasons to be creative.

I’d better keep writing.

282. Blog Burnout

Blogging has been kind of hard lately.

Mind, I’m not complaining. Blogging is fun, and I have no one to blame for TMTF but myself and my typewriter monkeys. (I mostly blame my monkeys.) I don’t ever want to gripe, and I’m certainly not looking for sympathy. I just want to admit, for the sake of honesty, that it’s been harder lately for me to get excited about TMTF and this whole blogging thing.

This worries me.

I love writing. It’s sort of an addiction, really. Now that I’ve almost-but-not-really given up on writing fiction, blogging is pretty much all I’ve got. I want TMTF to be something I get to do, not something I have to do.

That said, I’m going to hand over the discussion to my dear readers and go drink some coffee.

How do you stay passionate about your hobbies and creative projects? How do you deal with burnout? Send us a message or let us know in the comments!

No Internet

My connection to the weird, wonderful, wireless network known as teh internetz has been tragically broken.

A recent thunderstorm seems to have damaged my router, which blinks feebly and then dies every time it’s plugged in. I’ve called my Internet service provider, but they keep refusing to send technicians to resolve the problem.

Look, is it my fault that one of my typewriter monkeys bit the last technician they sent? Can’t we forgive and forget? Honestly.

My Internet connection won’t be restored for at least a few more days. For this and other reasons, TMTF must take a break for one week.

This blog took a break just a few weeks ago, and my honest intention was not to take another for a long time. I apologize for failing to update TMTF more regularly. I also blame my monkeys. If one of them hadn’t bit that technician, my Internet might have been fixed by now.

TMTF shall return (I hope) on Monday, June 30.

Thanks for your patience, dear reader, and thanks for reading!

271. Baking Bad

Due to a frightening case of culinary arson, TMTF will be taking a two-week break.

My typewriter monkeys decided yesterday to bake muffins. Ignoring my dad’s useful muffin-making tips, they cranked up the oven to its hottest setting, threw in the muffins and forgot about them. My brother and I got home from church to find smoke pouring out of the windows and flames dancing merrily on the roof.

Baking Bad

Where there’s smoke, there’s fire… or muffins, in this case.

My monkeys have been known to play with fire now and then, so this latest incident is no surprise. What has astonished me this time is that my monkeys have fled to Canada, either to evade arrest for arson or else to escape my righteous fury. They sent me an email last night promising to return before the end of the month.

Since I can’t maintain this blog without my typewriter monkeys, I must put it on hold for a couple of weeks. TMTF will be back on May 26. I sure hope my monkeys have returned by then.

In the meantime, I had better start cleaning up my apartment. It’s looking a bit… ashen.

We’ll be back on Monday, May 26. Thanks for reading!

250. Life Lessons from a Thirsty Blogger

So I drink a lot of coffee. Don't judge me.

Yes, I drink a lot of coffee. Don’t judge me.

If anyone has ever wondered how I come up with ideas for this blog, the picture above tells the whole story: I sit and drink coffee and wait for something to happen. What can I say? Blogging is thirsty work.

(Due credit to the inimitable Wes Molebash for the splendid caricature, which has become my official Internet profile picture and a new banner for this blog.)

Today marks another milestone in the sunny existence of Typewriter Monkey Task Force: a blog fueled by coffee, sustained by geeky enthusiasm and buoyed by the support of loved ones. This blog has allowed me to share my passion for everything from God to tea to Tolkien. In good times and in bad, working on TMTF has brought me no end of satisfaction, comfort, encouragement, joy and pleasure. It has also given me the privilege of connecting with many fascinating, creative, generous people—writers, bloggers, artists and others—whom I would otherwise never have known.

In the two and a half years since starting this silly blog, I have gained a number of personal insights about life, the universe and everything. Today—as my typewriter monkeys and I celebrate this milestone with banana shakes and coffee, respectively—I’d like to share ten of the best lessons I’ve learned since TMTF began.

I must focus on today

I’m really good at brooding about the past, worrying about the future and generally thinking about all times but the present. God has given me today. Yesterday and tomorrow are in his hands, and I need to leave them there. My business isn’t to be burdened by worries or regrets, but to make the most of the time I have been given.

What matters is not what I feel, but what I do

For a long time, I made a simple assumption: If I felt bad, I was doing badly; if I felt good, I was doing well. I was wrong. Feelings are mostly beyond my control and largely unconnected to how well or badly I’m living my life. Depression isn’t proof of failure, nor does success does guarantee happiness. I should do my best under all circumstances, no matter what I feel.

I need sleep

I hate to say it, but I can’t shrug off sleep deprivation. Those late nights playing Ace Attorney or reading random Wikipedia articles seriously affect my concentration, mood and overall health. A long sleep can totally brighten my day; a short sleep can tip me over the brink into sickness or severe depression. In fact, I would go so far as to say sleep is almost as important as coffee.

Prayer and Scripture really, really make a difference

The past two years have taught me that prayer and Scripture are anchors. These commitments to God keep me rooted in my faith and focused on things that matter. When I quit praying and reading Scripture, I drift away from God. When I drift away from God, I become kind of a jerk. When I become kind of a jerk, everybody loses. Prayer and Scripture make an incredible difference in my life for good—even more than coffee, which is saying something.

I am not a great writer

I’m a pretty good writer, I think. Writing is one of my greatest talents, along with drinking coffee and having magnificent sideburns. I’m a good writer—but not a great one. When I was younger, I assumed my writing was brilliant. Working on this blog, failing to make The Eliot Papers a success and (above all) reading fantastic works by truly great writers have given me healthy doses of perspective and humility.

Things don’t fall apart

Heck, I wrote an entire post about this. No matter how I try to keep things together, I shall sometimes fail. It is well, then, that God is there to hold things together when my best efforts can’t keep them from falling apart.

I can’t fix people, but I can love them

If Doctor Who has taught me one thing, it is the importance of having epic sideburns. If the series has taught me a second thing, however, it is the value in simply showing kindness. “The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things,” the good Doctor reminds us. “The good things don’t always soften the bad things, but vice versa, the bad things don’t necessarily spoil the good things or make them unimportant.” The world is full of hurting people. I may not be able to take away their bad things, but nothing will ever prevent me from adding to their good ones.

I must be focused and intentional

It is so hard—so darn hard—to stay focused. I seem to live in a disorienting fog of distractions, diversions and complications. Depression and obsessive-compulsive impulses are only slightly greater obstacles to productivity than the Internet and its endless wealth of interesting articles and funny cat pictures. A useful, meaningful life doesn’t just happen. It takes intention, self-control and (in my case) a good deal of caffeine.

People are awesome

Human beings are amazing, awful, odd, ordinary, selfish, selfless creatures. In general, they’re pretty awesome. I’ve realized it’s worth getting to know people, and important to respect even those I don’t know.

I have good reasons for believing in God

When I began this blog, I felt conflicted about God and life and the universe in general. Many of my questions about God were unanswered. Some of them still are. It was while working on this blog that I reached a fundamentally important conclusion: I have my doubts about God and Christianity, but my evidence in their favor definitely outweighs my evidence against them. No worldview makes perfect sense to me, but Christianity makes the most sense.

Well, dear reader, thanks for reading this blog, putting up with our shenanigans and generally being awesome. My sincere thanks to everyone who has supported this blog, and to God for grace and coffee and stuff. Here’s to many more cheerful ramblings about faith, writing, video games, literature, life, the universe and everything!

249. Share Your Blogging Wisdom!

I wish I knew more about blogging.

Seriously, I assumed I would have this blogging thing figured out by now. TMTF has been around for two and a half years. I’ve written nearly two hundred fifty posts—not counting a novella, some short stories, dozens of geeky commentaries, a handful of guest posts for other blogs and a series of reflections upon the Christian faith.

In all of this, I somehow managed to avoid learning anything.

All right, I may have learned a few things, but I want to learn more. I want to be a better blogger, and I’m asking for your help.

Today, dear reader, is your day! Today is the day you share your blogging wisdom! Tell me: If you have ever contributed to a blog or website, what is the most important insight, lesson, tip or trick you have learned?

Big Boss Wants You!

I want to hear what you have to say! I ask, implore, beg, command, dare and/or defy every blogger reading this to share at least one piece of blogging advice. I especially want to learn how to build a stronger platform, so insights into reaching a wider audience are particularly appreciated!

Share your advice in the comments below! If you prefer not to comment, use this blog’s Contact page or find me on Twitter to share your thoughts. I want to hear what you have to say!

Ladies and gentlemen, the floor is yours. Today I am your student. Take it away!

244. Many Are Cold, Few Are Frozen

Many Are Cold, Few Are FrozenI hate cold weather. There is a reason Dante put ice in the inmost circle of hell. When this blog froze—literally froze—last month, I felt pretty miserable, and very cold.

(My younger brother felt perfectly fine. He’s impervious to cold. It’s like a superpower.)

Late in January, when my typewriter monkeys got out of prison (don’t ask) and returned to my apartment, the cold was insufferable. It was then I decided to give my readers a glimpse into the trials of a chilly blogger and his assistants. Thus my dad sketched the Typewriter Monkey Task Force at work, depicting my monkeys typing with aching fingers, tails kinked by cold, fur specked with frost, muffled in parkas and muttering bitterly.

(Yes, I tried turning up the heat in my apartment, but my building’s feeble furnace was no match for winter’s insidious chill. Warm clothes were all that stood between us and the cruel ferocity of winter weather.)

I had planned to share my dad’s full sketch, but there was… a problem. My typewriter monkeys—pyromaniacs, every last of them—decided the best way to keep warm was to start a fire in my living room.

Well, a huge patch of my carpet has gone up in smoke, and my typewriter monkeys are back in the clink for arson, and only fragments of my dad’s lovely picture remains. I have shared this single scrap, singed and brittle, in gratefulness toward my parents for supporting my blog and in bitterness toward the Typewriter Monkey Task Force for burning a hole in my carpet.

Ah, well. I hope my monkeys are warmer in prison than they were in my apartment. Now, if you will excuse me, I should probably seek treatment for frostbite and hypothermia. I hope you’re warm, dear reader, wherever you are!

240. TMTF Chills Out

This blog has frozen. No, really. Even the Internet is not immune to the record-breaking cold that swept over America last week, and TMTF is encased in a thick layer of ice. My readers assure me they’re still able to navigate this blog, fortunately, but updating TMTF will be nearly impossible until it warms up. The ice is too thick, and a flock of penguins keeps getting in the way.

Penguin!

Typewriter Monkey Task Force: Now Featuring 100% More Penguins!

Since TMTF is on ice, this seems like a fine opportunity to take a break. I feel like I’ve taken too many breaks from this blog, but I have good reasons.

1. TMTF has frozen.

See above.

2. My typewriter monkeys are serving two weeks for arson, public indecency and possession of illegal pyrotechnics.

Don’t ask.

3. The past four months have been crazy.

Since September, I gained a housemate and gave up a project on which I had worked for nearly eight years. My car, Tribulation, lived up to its name and spent more than a month on the fritz. I had bouts with sickness and depression; in fact, at this very moment, I’m recovering from a really bad cold.

Most significantly, my job became very difficult.

I don’t write much about my employment in a home for gentlemen with disabilities. It’s a great job, but the last thing I want to do in my free time is to blog about work. However, without going into tedious details, I’ll share just a little.

Four major complications arose at my workplace in October. Months later, my coworkers and I are still feeling their effects. There have been a few days (and nights) in past months when my job has seemed kind of awful.

My life appears to be calming down at last—thank God! All the same, I could use a couple of weeks to rest, work ahead on this blog and finish the Ace Attorney game I started way back in October.

4. I have resolved to keep up with this lousy blog.

Keeping up with this blog is one of my resolutions for 2014, and I intend to keep it. I think giving myself a head start early in the year, even if it means taking a break, is the most sensible plan.

To tell the truth, I feel insecure when I take breaks from blogging. I have an irrational fear that readers will abandon TMTF the instant it stops updating regularly, or that it will fall apart the second I look away. It is at times such as these that I must reorder my priorities and remind myself that importance and urgency are not the same thing. This blog is important to me, but it doesn’t have to be urgent.

I think TMTF should chill out for a while.

We’ll be back on Monday, January 27. Here’s hoping this blog has thawed out by then!